The Monday Night Football Cat Explains All

A furry interruption at an NFL game goes instantly viral. The Meow in the Middle tells what happened. The Monday Night Football Cat Explains All

Sports Fans of America:

First things first: My name isn’t the Monday Night Football Cat, Football Cat, Giants Cat, Jets Cat, Mr. Trouble, Fluffy, Whiskers, Eli, Parcells, Kotite, Klecko or Kitty.


The Monday Night Football Cat Explains All

A Black Cat Runs On The Field During A Monday Night Football Game At Metlife Stadium.




It’s Brian.

I’m 7 years old, and I live in the New Jersey Meadowlands, which, if you’re a stray cat, is basically Paris. I mean, look at me. I eat uneaten stadium hot dogs for breakfast. Nachos for lunch. Stadium hot dogs again for dinner. I’m a big, strong dude.




I’m around MetLife Stadium all the time. Honestly, I’m not that into football, but you wouldn’t be so into football, either, if the football was Jets and Giants football. They’re not painting masterpieces in here. When I was just a little kitty, I saw The Buttfumble.

I’m more of a concerts guy. Love seeing Bon Jovi, of course. I’ve seen Springsteen at least 12 times. I got backstage at the Stones. Beyoncé ruled. Taylor Swift once petted my head.

Monday night, I made a mistake. I was on my way to a party—my friend, Melvin, was having a little thing, he’d caught a rat, and felt like sharing, when I took a wrong turn, and wound up on the field during the Giants-Cowboys game, on national television.

I had the same thought you had: Uh-oh. (I actually said something worse, but this is the Journal, and I know I can’t curse.)

I had to get out of there. So I ran. I ran as fast as I could. From the 50, to the 40, to the 30, to the 20, to the 10, to the 5, and into the end zone. I had no idea the TV cameras were trained on me. I didn’t know they were talking about me on ESPN and Kevin Harlan was rhapsodizing about me on radio.

The Monday Night Football Cat Explains All

The Black Cat During The New York Giants And The Dallas Cowboys Game




I heard the crowd begin to cheer. Look, I have had some amazing experiences in my life. I ate a seagull once. I found an entire sausage pizza in the upper deck. But there was nothing like hearing the stadium roar to life—for me.

I felt like one of the all-time greats. I felt like Saquon. I felt like Odell (I miss you buddy). I felt like LT, flattening a quarterback to the ground.

It was incredible. Tears welled in my eyes, I ain’t afraid to say it.

When I got to the end zone, I put a little razzle-dazzle on it. Security tried to chase me, and I left them in the dust. I know that’s not saying much. Those guys would have a hard time catching a tortoise.

I finally ran down a corridor and escaped. By the time I finally got to Melvin’s party, he’d eaten the entire rat, that punk.

But then I looked at my phone. It was blowing up. I must have had 150 messages.

(Yes, I Have A Phone. It’s An Iphone 4, But It Works Perfectly Great.)

I don’t want to get into specifics, but yes: Some teams are interested. At least a dozen clubs have asked me to come in this week for a workout. Some of them see me as a wide receiver. Others are imagining me returning kicks. I’m game to try anything. I imagine the Bears are open to a new quarterback.



 

Related Articles:



Carolyn’s Natural Organic Handmade Soap

Essential Oils User’s Guide

We Now Live In A World With Customized Bar Soaps, Lotions And Shampoos

Why Interior Designers And Home Stagers Prefer Bar Soap Over Liquid

Parabens: A Cancer-Causing And DNA-Damaging Preservative Used In The Food And Cosmetic Industries

Our Facebook Page

 

Your Questions And Comments Are Greatly Appreciated.

Carolyn A.


Testimonials

Lara Smith

I really like this soap. Great price a a nice mild scent. I do not care for overly scented products and this was fine.
This would make a great gift!

Lara Smith

I really like this soap. Great price a a nice mild scent. I do not care for overly scented products and this was fine.
This would make a great gift!

Tina A.

Customer

Great price a a nice mild scent. I do not care for overly scented products and this was fine.
This would make a great gift! I really like this soap.

Tina A.

Customer

Great price a a nice mild scent. I do not care for overly scented products and this was fine.
This would make a great gift! I really like this soap.